Detoxify Mega Clean Review: A Lifesaver or Liquid Failure?

If you have ever stared at a job offer letter and felt a pit in your stomach because you smoked a joint last weekend—or last night—you are the target audience for Detoxify Mega Clean. It is one of the most recognized “detox drinks” on the market, sold everywhere from Walmart to your local head shop.

It promises to flush your system of toxins (specifically THC metabolites) for a short window, allowing you to pass a urinalysis with your own urine. But does it actually work, or is it just expensive, red-colored sugar water?

My Experience With Detoxify Mega Clean

I purchased the 32oz bottle of Detoxify Mega Clean (Tropical Fruit flavor) because I fit the profile of a “heavy toxin” user:

I am over 200 pounds and I partake daily. I had exactly 48 hours before my test, so a natural detox was mathematically impossible.

I stopped all intake immediately and drank a gallon of water a day leading up to the “event.”

On the morning of the test, I woke up three hours before my appointment. The bottle is massive—32 ounces is a lot of liquid to consume when you are nervous.

I shook it violently as instructed and started chugging. The taste is… intense.

It is thick, syrupy, and tastes like a melted red popsicle mixed with crushed vitamins.

It isn’t the worst thing I have ever tasted, but getting down a full liter of it in 15 minutes was a struggle.

It sits heavy in your stomach.

After finishing the bottle, I waited 15 minutes, refilled it with water, and drank that too. This is the “flush” phase. Within 30 minutes, the bloating hit. I felt like a water balloon. Then came the bathroom trips. You must be near a toilet. I urinated four times in the first hour. The first two were slightly dark, but by the third and fourth, my urine was a vibrant, almost radioactive yellow. This is the B-vitamins kicking in to ensure your sample doesn’t look like clear water.

I took a home test strip on my fourth void (about 90 minutes after finishing the drink). It was negative. A faint line, but a line nonetheless. I headed to the lab, confident but sweating. I made sure to catch the sample “mid-stream” (peeing in the toilet first, then the cup, then finishing in the toilet).

The after-effects were real. About two hours after the test, I had significant stomach cramping and diarrhea. This is common; the drink is essentially a high-dose laxative and diuretic designed to purge everything. But the result? I passed the lab test. It wasn’t comfortable, and the anxiety was high, but for a heavy user on short notice, it did exactly what it claimed to do.

Pros Of Detoxify Mega Clean

Scientifically Formulated Masking: Unlike drinking just water, which leads to a “diluted” result (which is often a fail), Mega Clean is packed with Creatine and B-Vitamins (Riboflavin). The Creatine ensures your urine has the correct specific gravity, and the B-Vitamins turn your clear, diluted urine back to a natural yellow color. This chemical balance is critical for passing the validity check at the lab.
Designed for “High Toxin” Levels: Many detox drinks come in 16oz or 20oz bottles, which are often insufficient for people with higher body mass indices (BMI) or heavy usage habits. The 32oz Mega Clean is specifically engineered for larger bodies or those with high toxin buildup, providing a larger volume of fluid to flush the kidneys effectively.
Includes Pre-Cleanse Pills (Often): Depending on where you buy it (especially online), it often comes bundled with six “PreCleanse” pills. These are taken 12–24 hours before the drink to help prime your system. While the drink works on its own, this added layer of preparation helps loosen toxins from fat cells before the final flush, slightly increasing your odds of success.
Wide Availability: You don’t have to order this from a shady dark web site and wait a week. Detoxify Mega Clean is sold at major retailers like The Vitamin Shoppe, Walmart (online), and almost every smoke shop in America. If you find out about a test on Tuesday for Wednesday, you can drive out and buy this immediately.
Psychologically Safer than Synthetic Urine: For many people, the idea of strapping a bottle of fake pee to their leg and keeping it at 98 degrees is terrifying. Using Mega Clean allows you to walk into the testing facility with nothing in your pockets. You are using your own body, which eliminates the risk of getting caught with contraband or having a temperature failure with synthetic urine.
Clear Effectiveness Window: The product gives you a specific timeline. You know that between 2 and 5 hours after drinking, you are in the “zone.” This predictability allows you to schedule your appointment or intake accurately, rather than guessing when you might be clean.

Cons Of Detoxify Mega Clean

Severe Digestive Distress: You cannot ignore the physical toll this drink takes. It is loaded with herbs like Burdock Root and Uva Ursi, plus massive amounts of sugar and vitamins. This combination almost guarantees diarrhea, bloating, and stomach cramps. You effectively have to plan your day around being close to a bathroom before and after the test.
The “Neon” Urine Risk: While the B-vitamins are necessary to color the urine, Mega Clean can sometimes work too well, turning your urine a fluorescent, highlighter green-yellow. A strict lab technician might flag this as suspicious. You have to balance drinking enough extra water to dilute the color slightly without diluting the gravity.
It Is NOT a Permanent Detox: The name is misleading. This does not “detox” you in the sense of permanently removing drugs from your system. It is a masking agent. It creates a 3-5 hour window where your urine is clean. If you take a test the next morning without drinking it again, you will fail. It is a temporary fix, not a cure.
High Sugar Content: The drink is incredibly sweet and high in calories (often comparable to two sodas). If you are diabetic or sensitive to sugar crashes, this can be dangerous or at least very unpleasant. The sugar spike is followed by a lethargic crash right around the time you are trying to take your test.
Pricey One-Time Use: At roughly $40 to $50 per bottle, it is an expensive beverage. If you have to take multiple tests or if the first test gets rescheduled, you are out that money and have to buy another one. Compared to the “Certo Method” (fruit pectin and Gatorade) which costs $5, this is a premium solution.

Usage & Preparation Tips

The 48-Hour Abstinence Rule: No detox drink is a magic wand. If you smoke 30 minutes before drinking this, you will fail. You absolutely must stop all toxin intake at least 48 hours before the test. This allows your body to process the most recent metabolites so the drink only has to mask the “stored” toxins.
Maximize the “Golden Window”: The optimal time to take your test is 3 hours after you finish the drink. The first hour is for urinating frequently (at least 3-4 times) to clear out the “dirty” urine sitting in your bladder. By hour 3, your body is pumping out the “masked” urine. By hour 5, the effect fades. Do not drink this the night before!
The Mid-Stream Technique: When you are in the stall, never pee directly into the cup at the start of your stream. The initial urine contains the highest concentration of sediment and toxins. Pee in the toilet for a few seconds, catch the “mid-stream” in the cup, and then finish in the toilet. This simple mechanical trick can lower toxin counts significantly.
Avoid Fatty Foods: THC metabolites are stored in fat cells. For 48 hours before the test, avoid fatty foods (fried food, cheese, burgers). Eat lean proteins and veggies. Eating fat can trigger your body to release stored THC back into your bloodstream right when you are trying to hide it.
Creatine Loading: While the drink contains creatine, it helps to start taking a creatine ethyl ester supplement 2-3 days before the test. This ensures your creatinine levels are naturally high, so when the drink dilutes your urine, you don’t drop below the “dilute” threshold which causes a re-test.

Comparison with Other Brands

Herbal Clean QCarbo32: This is the direct competitor to Mega Clean. QCarbo32 is generally cheaper (often $30 vs $50) and arguably easier to find. However, reviews often suggest that QCarbo32 has a harsher taste (like cayenne pepper and rot) and causes even more severe stomach cramping. Mega Clean is generally considered the “premium” version with a slightly higher success rate for heavier users (over 200lbs).
Rescue Cleanse (Test Clear): Among serious users on Reddit and forums, Rescue Cleanse often rates higher than Mega Clean. It claims to have a longer “clean window” (up to 5 hours) and tastes better (Cran-Apple). However, it is harder to find in physical stores and usually requires shipping. If you have a week to plan, buy Rescue Cleanse. If you have 24 hours, buy Mega Clean.
Quick Fix (Synthetic Urine): This is a completely different approach. Quick Fix is fake urine that you smuggle in. It has a 99.9% success rate if you get the temperature right (90-100°F). Mega Clean has a lower success rate (maybe 85-90%) but zero risk of being caught with contraband. If you are being watched (probation), use Mega Clean. If you have privacy, Quick Fix is scientifically safer but physically riskier.
Toxin Rid: This is not a drink; it is a 5 to 10-day pill course. It is designed to actually detox your body permanently, not just mask it. If you have two weeks before your test, Toxin Rid is infinitely better because you will be genuinely clean. Mega Clean is the “emergency brake” for when you don’t have time for Toxin Rid.

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ)

Does Detoxify Mega Clean work for THC?

Yes. While it works for all toxins by diluting urine, it is most commonly used for THC. However, because THC is stored in fat, it is the hardest to mask. Heavy daily smokers (multiple times a day) have a higher failure rate than casual smokers.

How long does Detoxify Mega Clean last?

The “clean zone” typically begins 90 minutes after finishing the full regimen and lasts up to 5 hours. The peak effectiveness is usually around the 3-hour mark.

Can labs detect Detoxify Mega Clean?

Labs generally do not test for the ingredients in the drink itself (herbs/vitamins). They test for validity: pH, specific gravity, and creatinine. Mega Clean is formulated to keep these levels normal. However, if you drink too much additional water, you will dilute the sample too much and get a “Dilute Negative,” which often requires a re-test.

What is the best detox drink for a drug test?

For heavy users or those over 200lbs, Detoxify Mega Clean and Rescue Cleanse are the two highest-rated options. For lighter users, the smaller QCarbo16 is often sufficient.

Conclusion

Detoxify Mega Clean is not magic, but it is science. It effectively exploits the gap between “diluted urine” and “valid urine” to help you pass a test you otherwise wouldn’t. It is expensive, tastes unpleasant, and will wreck your stomach for an afternoon, but it is one of the most reliable “Hail Mary” plays available for a smoker on short notice.